Motorsports, Dying and Me

When it comes to motorsports some think they’ve died and gone to heaven. The dying that I am talking about, however, doesn’t tend to be so euphoric.

The dying I’m talking about is the real thing…you know – dead, gone, hasta la vista baby. 

Now that I have your attention – first things first – I’m not dying.  Well….. not that I’m aware of, anyway. People are dying though. All day, everyday.

And many of these people are terrified and bewildered.

And, I want to help them.  

What does this have to do with motorsports and me though?  Well, I am wrapping up my 9 year career in the motorsports industry in order to help individuals (and their loved ones) who are dying. 

The reason for this blog post is to explain to those within my sphere the big shift in my professional life.

So why the shift and above all, why death?!?

For those that know me well; know that this isn’t so much of shift, as it is a full circle. I always knew that I wanted to help others, even as a teenager.  Back then, I thought making someone feel beautiful (by being a hairdresser or esthetician), would really be “helping” them. My Grandpa Nehring challenged me to seek a helping career that wasn’t just skin deep. So instead, I earned a BScN and became a Registered Nurse.

Nursing was a great profession but eventually got in the way of another very important calling – motherhood. Once the kids were in school full time, I did what any normal nurse would do…… become an owner in a motorsports business. LOL!

Say what?!?  

The motorsports company, UTV Canada, was a result of my father’s vision/passion and both my parents blood, sweat and tears.  What started out for me as a part-time gig to help my parents and to pay for my nursing refresher course turned into the equivalent of hands-on MBA, where I had the opportunity to learn every area of the business. And, most lessons were learned the hard way, of course. (Haha!) To be a business owner alongside my parents and sister has been a life changing experience for me.  I am eternally grateful to my parents for the opportunity they gave me and to my sister, Stacy, for seeing my strengths when I couldn’t see them for myself.  

New Calling

In the last few years I became restless. Something was missing.   I needed to be helping others again and I wanted to strike out on my own.  Enter the world of end of life care and my calling as an End of Life Coach.  This new career path marries the core of who I am (helping and empowering others) with the life experiences I have been privileged to have thus far (Registered Nurse and Business Owner)

Why Death?

With so many possibilities in the healthcare field, many people have asked me why are you choosing to help those that are dying? I’m going to give you the Coles Notes version…… otherwise this could get really long. 

Here are the 5 main reasons why I am becoming an End of Life Coach.

Every single person I know, myself included, is going to die.  

100% chance. 

If everyone I know and love is going to experience it, why would I not invest in trying to make things better for them, myself and future generations?  

This is one of the hardest things that anyone will ever do. 

Whether it is dying themselves or accompanying someone that is dying, endings and transitions of themselves are just plain hard.  Combine that with the finality of death, the fear of pain and the unknown and it becomes overwhelming really, really fast.

In North America, we don’t do death well.  

We live in a death denying culture whereby somehow making plans and talking about death means that we will either hasten its coming or that we have lost hope in those that are dealing with illness. It is difficult to discuss, for sure, but it has been made even more difficult because most people are so far removed from death.  This is a result of death being medicalized by the healthcare industry and sterilized by the funeral industry. It was only a few generations ago where family and community members would care for those that were dying and then tend to every aspect of the post-death care. Now, however, all these duties have now been delegated and we have lost the art of caring for one another at such a crucial and precious time.

There are no re-do’s in Death

In all of life’s most momentous occasions, none of them are as final as death.  Your graduation, your wedding, the birth of your children…all pretty big events, huh?  But, it is possible to have another crack at those things. Death however – not so much.  

I have hope for our society and a better way to meet death

It is my mission to equip individuals and families with the necessary tools so that they may meet death with courage, frankness, openness and some degree of confidence.  Tools that will help them create an end of life plan, have the difficult yet life changing conversations, create clarity of goals and to make the last months, weeks and moments meaningful.

By equipping those that are dealing with death today, we can empower future generations.  We as a society need to reclaim how we handle death and I want to help lead the change.

If you want to join me, sign up for my newsletter. You’ll learn more about how you and those you love can do death better, courageous stories, as well as practical ways to live even when you’re dying.

And, let’s face it – we’re all dying. Every day we are all one step closer to completion.

You can also follow me on Facebook. Thanks for stopping by.

Much love, 

Tara